(Source: whitelaws, via itskatielouise)
A Day In The Life Of.
This is me…and my awesomerainbowhandbeanie
ChloeSelmes
I am insecure. Especially in front of the camera. That is why I am always the one behind the camera.
Jealousy.
Sometimes I just look in the mirror and stare. She is behind me, fixing her hair and makeup. Why do I feel so insecure to my younger sister. Why am I jealous of her?
Is it because she has the size eight figure and I struggle with being a size 12?
Is it because I see her face as beautiful and I pick out all the flaws with my face?
Is it because everyone thinks she is funny?
Is it because the way she dresses?
Is it because she isn’t expected to be independent as I am?
Is it because she has the money to spend on new clothes?
She asks me all the time why I don’t go and buy new clothes. I don’t have the money I say. She doesn’t believe me. She is the kind of girl that spends her whole pay check on clothes and vintage materials. I still wear my hoodie from three years ago. I have one pair of jeans for winter. My wardrobe is not even half full yet hers is busting at the seams. She wears all the clothes I wish I could wear. She owns things I would only dream to own.
She asked me what I wanted for my 18th birthday the other day. I said a Polaroid camera. The next day she came into work and showed me the new Polaroid camera she bought. For herself.
I think I just hold all this in. I don’t want to be jealous of her. She just drives me insane with everything.
I love her but she is doing a better job at being me than I am.
